Notice of disappointment: No, this isn’t a post where I put up my picture or rant about something.
Lately I’ve been saddled with this thought that this blog is the largest repository of my thoughts, with more words than any of combined fiction manuscripts. This is even after deleting most of my posts from 2014-16. If something ever happened to me, here is where most of my mind would exist.
I don’t want people to get the impression that I’m the sum of a bunch of rants, bad fiction, and frustrations. I am not a person who is the sum of depression and anxiety. The things that disappoint me are not what makes me who I am.
Although I always get out of sorts when I admit things about myself, I am different than all of this. I am a trained legal mind who was good enough to pass the Florida Bar Exam. I went to all of that effort because deep down I love the law, and I love what it can do for people. It can do so much more than it does right now, and sadly so many people are denied the perspective that I have of it. If I could have one wish granted, it would be to get the chance to practice in appellate work.
I also like learning things. Whether it’s stuff about math or how they cooked desserts in the 1700’s, to new space exploration projects and new discoveries here on Earth, I am a glutton for new ideas. Ideas are not inherently good or bad, but they can be problematic when applied. Knowledge will forever govern ignorance, so the saying goes, and on occasion I’ll learn something that sticks.
Recently I haven’t been as active as I used to. I get disappointed when I miss important stuff, like wishing Canadians a Happy Canada Day or my fellow Americans a Happy Independence Day. Normally I like taking opportunities to wish people well. I don’t think there’s enough of that at times, or at least it isn’t always noticeable.
This is just a small, vague part of who I am. While I don’t always share it, I exist outside of the Internet. I can’t share some of it because of other considerations, but I’m getting to the point where I don’t want that to limit me anymore.