I’m still dealing with the fallout of my manic episode. The good news is that the Wellbutrin is fully out of my system, but the bad news is that I’m still having some anxiety in relation to the mania. I try to be gentle and remind myself that I wasn’t in my right mind.
Right now I have this urge to just run and hide and hope things blow over. That’s the depression and anxiety talking. Fear is always my first response. Somehow I’m getting past that. I’m even writing about it. If I don’t delete this, then it will be a reminder that I do respond positively to setbacks.
On the plus side, I’ve made my first batch of fermented hot sauce. It’s not as spicy as I thought it was going to be. Since I didn’t put any vinegar in it, the culture is still fermenting the sauce. From what (little) I understand about the process, the culture should be producing lactic acid even when it’s in the fridge. This makes it taste a little different than I’m used to, but to be fair, I’ve never had homemade fermented hot sauce before.
I also have the makings for a tiramisu cake that I found online. All the ingredients are in metric, which is something I prefer to imperial units. Everywhere else in the world already understands this, but grams mean you’re dealing in weight, and milliliters are dealing in volume. There’s no need to worry about whether something is dry measure or liquid measure. And metric is more precise.
Metric rant aside, the only thing I’m changing about the cake recipe are the decorations. Instead of happy little stars, I want to make eldritch tentacles. Culinary Cthulhu needs to be a thing.
Finally, my book is actually coming along, despite my altered mental state. It’s slow, but the fact that I’ve written anything in the past couple of weeks is surprising. Some days, I was barely able to stay focused enough to be in one place longer than five minutes. Progress is progress, though. I will not take that away from myself.